Blushing

I have just finished writing a novel. I think I'll write that sentence again because it just felt so darned good. I have just finished writing a novel.
I want to scream it to the world, to tell everyone just how very much I rock. Yet I say nothing. Why? Because when I tell people that I have just finished writing a novel, I will have to answer the inevitable next question-- what's it about? I could tap dance around the fact that what I have written is a romance, but doing so would feel like a cop out because ... well, it is a cop out. I should be blushing with pride at my achievement. Instead I am blushing with embarrassment. And it isn't that I'm not proud of what I've written-- I'm hugely, amazingly, extraordinarily proud of it. It is one hell of a book and when I reread it I can hardly believe that it came from me-- from my imagination, from my mind, from my heart, from my hands. It was a labor of love, and let me just say again-- I am extremely proud of it. But I am worried about how people will react when I tell them I have written a romance novel, and this worrying about what people think business is kind of new territory for me.
When I first started writing fiction, I wanted to write a mystery, something along the order of the Stephanie Plum books by Janet Evanovich. I finished (for the most part) that book and it will never see the light of day. That was my learning book, and what I learned was: A. I'm not so good when it comes to plotting-- sort of a deal breaker for writing a mystery, and B. What I really enjoyed was writing the interaction between the two main characters. In short, I learned that what I liked to write is romance. I like the emotional conflict, the sexual tension, the idea that the reader is in on the secret-- that these two characters are destined to be together in spite of themselves and the world that I created for them.
But in my world, the real world where I have a job in public relations and where I have a reputation as a no nonsense whip cracker, I admit that I am reluctant to share the true nature of what I write. I have friends here, good friends, and they know I'm writing a book, but they don't know what it's about. They still think I'm writing a mystery, and I have said nothing to make them think otherwise.
I am not ashamed of what I write. I am however ashamed of my reluctance to own up to it. I know what a lot of people say about romances. I know because before I started reading and writing it, I said the same things. Well, maybe I didn't say them, but I thought them. Romance is fluffy bunny women's stuff. Why would women want to read about sex. Romances are nothing more than escapism.
Let me start with the fluffy bunny thing. We live in a time when women are awfully hard on other women and where "professionalism" is code for-- Act like a man. I guess the thinking is that to be successful, women have to distance themselves from anything soft or emotional. But here's the thing: Women are emotional. I don't mean dissolve into hysterics at the slightest provocation emotional, I mean that we have emotional responses to situations that are on the whole more powerful than our male counterparts, which is not in any way meant to imply that men aren't emotional or have no feelings. Not at all. I believe the science of brain chemistry will back me up on this, and if I wasn't so lazy I'd research it. suffice it to say, I think I read an article once that supported my theory. Probably it was somebody else's theory first though. I'm almost certain it was. And given how little we actually know about the brain, I think you're safe in just trusting that I'm correct. So let's go with that and move on.
Now the sex thing. Yes, there is sex in romance, sometimes a lot of it. But there is sex in everything. It's in movies, on TV, in music, not to mention pornography of all kinds-- hell, it's practically the god of our collective consciousness. In romances at least, the sex is more than just sex. It is almost always portrayed as part of a, if not loving relationship, than at least one based in respect that has the potential to grow into love. and in romances, sex has consequences, even if they are simply emotional consequences. Society has claimed sex for entertainment value, and I think it's an act of liberation for women to reclaim it as their own, and if they do so by reading and/or writing romances, then all the better.
escapism. Isn't all entertainment escapism? Isn't the highest compliment one can pay a book or movie, "I got so involved that I lost track of time or even where I was." That's powerful, and if my book can do that for somebody, then I will feel like the Queen of the freakin' universe. I get just as wrapped up in action adventure novels, or mysteries, or even the Harry Potter books, as I do in romances. Because that is what good books do. They pick you up, carry you off, and drop you down in another place and another time and make you never want to leave. Escapism? yes please
Women have been defending their choice to read and write romance ever since Jane Austen, and her arguments were far more eloquent and pithy than mine. Pick up a copy of Northanger Abby if you don't believe me. So if it was good enough for Austen, shouldn't it be good enough for me?